Planting New Seeds: An Interview with Remy Fernandez O’Brien

Investigating Roots

I’ve spent several months considering the theme of building trust. This concept is deeply important to me as I’ve spent years as a people leader considering how to approach this. I’ve mused at what trust actually is. What does trust mean for leaders, what does it mean for followers, what does it mean for partners? One of the most important jobs I’ve held was teaching dance at my high school in Amherst, Massachusetts as a recent alumni. One of the talented students whom I had the privilege to support has now become the full time dance teacher at the school, taking over for our mentor, Tracy Vernon, who led the program for decades. Remy Fernandez O’Brien graduated in 2008 from Amherst Regional High School and has also completed programs at Brown University and the Harvard Graduate School of Education. Remy states it was at Brown where they came to appreciate ‘hip hop culture’ and started seeing the intersectionality of their other interests. “Hip hop culture and the dances associated with it are what I am really in love with,” they said. They feel it’s important for white people who are “guests in hip hop culture to approach it with respect and humility.”

I approached Remy with the idea to interview them on this topic of building trust as they begin to build their dance program with youth. I knew the idea of building trust between student and teacher was an essential part of the learning experience they had with myself and Tracy when engaged with the dance program. Now in their third year teaching in this role, Remy reflected with me on their own experiences of building trust with young dancers. Trust, in their experience, being a mutually invested process between student and teacher. “I’m asking them to be vulnerable (and dance is probably one of the most vulnerable things you could do in high school); and also to try something new but do it together, with me. Trust in this program is the belief that if the student invests that I will hold the space to make that investment worth it to them. That I will keep the space safe even for their worst self. You can show up one day as a lump and that’s ok!”

Examining Process

We talked together about specific actions that they leverage to contribute to this continuous process of building trust with young people. “I like to surprise people,” Remy shared, “by not being the adult they are used to seeing, so they can get out of autopilot. Asking specifically ‘what do you need in this situation? What do you need to make this work and to show up? We co-create rules and guidelines together that we both abide by”. Remy talked about their primary tactic of intentionally engaging people who have traditionally been underserved and/or marginalized and putting them into meaningful leadership roles. Youth participants being the best method of gaining the trust and investment of other youth. “Just seeing someone who they resonate with as a student being successful and really thriving in the program provides a deep level of trust for someone new”. 

Surprises, however, isn’t always the first tactic in efforts to get an administration to trust you. When Remy was thinking about building trust within the school system they shared the power of mentorship. Their superior and mentor has grown in the district for over twenty years and he has supported Remy to be thoughtful and intentional with how they create and talk about their programs. They talked about the role self trust plays on a daily basis. “Sometimes I have to remind myself of the gratitude I have. I chose this role. I chose to do it in a way not everyone will understand and may even be a little reactive to it. My mentor talks about ‘standing in her pedagogy ten toes down’. The experience I had in this dance program as a student myself- being identified as a youth leader and being provided a safe space to express my identity in many ways for the first time- is still visceral for me. So, the groundwork to create a similar space for young people now is complex but familiar. I invite people in and respond to the moment. So much of good teaching I think is the match with the community and the moment. One of the core things to me as a teacher is the ability to help someone else. I’m better at learning something new with someone, for someone. It’s how I’m motivated.”

Growing the Seeds

I asked Remy about what questions they had as they planned for the growth of their program. They shared they are starting a Hip Hop Arts Ensemble in the spring, a dream held since they started teaching. Remy talked about how this new initiative would be the biggest step in trusting students as stewards of their own art forms to create a collective, cohesive experience. Both Remy and youth participants would build this new, multi-art program based on participants interests and expertise in different art forms. “I’m excited and also nervous about it because I’m not the expert in all their forms. When it’s dance, sure, I can help guide them through, but this is about everyone in the room being an expert in their own way. That will have implications on the entire program. I’m always interested in how kids can take something they are passionate about and run with it knowing and trusting that I’ll be here to hold the space and support their vision.”

I stepped away from our conversation feeling humbled and inspired by Remy’s perspective on building and growing trust both with young learners as well as maintaining their own self trust as they forge a place for themselves as a young professional. I’m reminded that trust is a practice we are either building up or breaking down every day. Although a big responsibility, this is a seed worth nourishing. 

Youth Depicted: Marisol.

  • Killebrew, VHD. (2023) “Planting New Seeds: An Interview with Remy Fernandez O’Brien” Creative Generation.